A new year begins... what do you want it to be?
I’m just off the phone with my bestie Linda – whom many of you know from our eco adventures in 2023.Â
It’s the most wonderful thing to have friends that you can talk to. I always enjoy our chats be they simple quick chats or deep ‘the Universe and everything ‘ chats. My partner is the same. I can talk and giggle about pretty much everything with him. I am very lucky. I know that.Â
I also have some friends that are going through a hard time – and some that just find daily life difficult. I try to be there for them but I also know that it’s very important to keep one hand on your own heart (as my counsellor advised) – in other words, be sure to always have one half of your giving for yourself to self-care and self-mind – and then, give what you can emotionally to those you care about.Â
This is not an easy task as any caregivers will know.Â
I overheard a man on the radio this morning, Dr Harry Barry, GP and Mental Health specialist on the Claire Byrne Show (Listen here >>) and found myself nodding and agreeing whole-heartedly at his advice.
I am not a parent myself (unfortunately), however, I do have friends and siblings who are, and his words rang true – everyone is so busy rushing about, getting their kids to various classes and events, sometimes to the detriment of those kids and indeed to the relationship of the parents between themselves.
A New Year is no better time than other to step back and re-evaluate.
Is this what you imagined growing up would look like?
Is it necessary?
My ex partner whom I had been with for over 20 years and lived with for 10 years recently passed away in the very kind care of Wexford hospital.
He was 10 years older than I. At my age he was as healthy as I am now. Yet only 10 years on at the age of 62 he is gone. He was fit, never smoked, did enjoy social pints at his local and good food – yet lung cancer ultimately caused his death, the tumors pushing in on his breathing pipe so that he couldn’t breathe. I was literally with him, holding his hand as he took his final breath. I have never watched a human die before my eyes before. I never saw the yellowing of the skin, heard the rattle breath, saw the last moments.. Naturally it is in mind one month later.Â
I made a decision in 2018 to ‘improve myself’. I wasn’t sure how that would go, or what way I would do it.
I took a year long Yoga teacher training course with Earthwise Yoga in Bree, Co Wexford and followed up with Chair Yoga Teacher Training with Claire Osborne, even though I had only been to yoga once or twice. I was excited and nervous. As a shy woman I was worried abut not fitting in with what I imagined would be super fit slim women – but it turned out that slim to beautifully curvy, we were all the same underneath – thoughtful, caring and spiritual. I made so many lovely connections and learnt so much about myself during that year and progressed to hold yoga classes of my own which my students reportedly enjoyed – especially during a big lightening storm in meditation!
Every morning now I self practice and it makes me feel warm and ready for the day.Â
There’s a wonderful picture on our bedroom wall of an icy mountain with an indigenous tribe journeying along the icy path with all their belongings. The caption reads: ‘There is no way to happiness, happiness is the way‘ .
I stared at that poster many nights before falling asleep. It took me a while before I got it. There literally is no plan, steps or guide to happiness.
When you feel happiness treasure it, and follow it.Â
As a middle child and twin who grew up in the 70’s I missed out on swimming lessons so, whilst I live a few minutes’ walk to the sea I mostly look at it.
In the Summer I am brave and am often first to get in to the cold water. I have tried swimming lessons again but, it’s definitely easier as child I reckon and frankly, Jaws never really left my mind!
This Spring however my partner and I will wear our wetsuits where, in exchange for my teaching him Yoga, he will teach me to swim and relax in the sea!Â
I have always loved nature, having moved at the age of 7 from Tallaght to Glencullen where my senses were overcome by this amazing smell – Nature!
Literally hillside grasses, wild flowers, trees and a small brook that led to a river. For the first time I felt myself open up to the world. I had a wild crab-apple tree house and brought my doll to swim in the stream with my twins’ ‘Action Man’ (later replaced by Mork)!
The wild peppermint was strong and a cuckoo sang across the valley at teatime every evening. It was pure bliss.Â
Of course we became teenagers and as our school was in Dundrum and we started hanging out there after school my folks decided it best to move back to the suburbs so they could keep an eye on us
(They later moved back to the countryside where they managed to (eventually) be welcomed to the local community with my dad having the “biggest funeral they’d seen in years” – testimony to his beautiful caring nature and friendly disposition…
RIP Tommy Kelly xÂ
I have worked across many industries in all types of jobs both in Ireland and abroad, from chambermaid in Lisbon (You don’t like the sea Rosa?) to quality control inspector, hotel receptionist, garden centre assistant, restaurant hostess to web designer.Â
In my day (lol, seriously!) it was unusual to go to college but there were great alternative paths and courses, of which I did many – Hotel Reception & Tourism, Display Design, Photography, Multimedia, Web Design, Global Marketing and Digital Skills.
(My dog Skippy of my first website ‘TheWicklowWay.ie’ ate all my certificates!)Â
I have learnt that actually it doesn’t really matter what you do as your path will guide you ultimately to where you’re supposed to be.Â
For example my bestie and I had totally different paths yet 20 years later we re-met and are not only as strong as ever, we both work in similar fields
Tourism, web and nature!Â
The secret is to consume little, give back to nature and be kind. By giving your time and your kindness on a daily basis you receive time and kindness back tenfold. Â
Let me share some of my favourite lines from the meditations I listen to as they always make me smile.Â
- Shower unknown blessings upon me and surprise me with joy
- By doing nothing, it all gets done
- There is no way to happiness, happiness is the way
So for 2025 I wish you all peace, light and happiness. Here are my tips for taking the time to reach this:
- Make time for yourself every dayÂ
- Keep one hand on your heart always
- Give what you can with the other hand
- If you need two hands for your heart sometimes then do so.Â
- Work when you need to but reduce what you need so you don’t need to work so much
- Be happy with lessÂ
- Be open to love
- Be kind to yourself and to others
- Breath deeply and stretch every morningÂ
- DRINK MORE WATER – I am still working on this!!Â
Namaste
Roz x
